When Dads Need to Grow Up...

There is a degree of tyranny inherent in being a father. Or else the kids would have constant pillow fights on the sofa and ice cream sundaes for most meals. Imagine total kid anarchy. But in a happy family, that tyranny has to be a benevolent tyranny. A rule by tough love and encouragement, not a selfish tyranny. Not a rule by intimidation, fear, oppression or degradation. In the end it makes the difference between becoming a respected Dad or a despised Dad.

Recently my dear wife was talking with her nut-case Mom on the phone and had to correct her about something. Now my dear wife isn't known for sparing the hammer when driving a point, even with a bent nail like her Mom. But this didn't seem like such a big deal. But her nut-case Mom likes to take things personally and do stupid things because of it. The next day, my dear wife got a call on her cell phone from her Dad. He vented with all the diplomatic tact of a foul mouthed 8 year old having a temper tantrum. I give him credit for 8 only because a 4 year old doesn't know so many bad words. He called my wife to chew her out for upsetting her Mom so much, for aggravating her health problems and went on to say a lot of stuff that any parent would regret saying. I got all of this second hand, because I was the next phone call my wife made. She was understandably upset from what I can only describe as a verbally abusive rant. If her Dad meant to communicate anything other than abuse and degredation, he sure botched it up bigtime. Unforgivable ... Grandpa needs to grow up.

Scorched earth diplomacy has no place in a family setting...

Now I know family living can be tumultuous. Remember, I have 6 brothers and sisters. Here with my wife and family I've had to step in occasionally when my dear wife becomes overly agitated because the kids are driving her nuts. God grant us the strength to be better parents than ours...