The Naughty List

I remember when I was a kid that Santa's poor list management skill was enough to shake my faith in Christmas. Us kids, we all knew who was naughty and who was nice. We knew who should get the presents and who should get the sticks and lumps of coal. But Santa seemed to be so easily duped. In fact, the naughtier kids always seemed to get the best stuff. And boast the most.

Our parents would chide us about being nice and not naughty so that Santa would bring us presents. But when we got back to school after Christmas everyone seemed to have made the nice list, no matter how bad. In fact, it seemed the already overindulged spoiled brats and bullies got rewarded best!

It sends a message...

Hence another of our societal disparities. We say that Santa knows who's naughty or nice and will only reward the nice kids. Then, in action he rewards naughty as well...

Christmas Discipline...

My Mom complains that my Dad is the hardest person to get Christmas gifts for. When asked to give suggestions or put up a Christmas gift hint list, my Dad responds with a very short list of things like "A healthy family" or "Peace on Earth". Very much in the spirit of Christmas, but not exactly helpful for the commercial adventure that Christmas has become.

But in reality my Mom is much harder to get gifts for. You see, my Mom practices one of the Christmas cardinal sins. She is notorious for buying things for herself while Christmas shopping. Especially if it is "a bargain". Anything that might be a candidate for her Christmas list gets bought... If we find a good Christmas gift for Mom, there is always the risk that she already has it. We can't even hint about something or she'll go looking. So gifts for Mom are tough.

I've been told I'm tough to get gifts for too. I don't fully understand it since I can always come up with lots of ideas for what to get for myself. But I'll admit that some of the items on my Christmas list may seem a bit steep with things like the 427 AC Cobra and M1 Abrams Main Battle Tank. But at least I've resisted the alluring urge to get something I want during holiday sales and will instead put it on my list.

There is a simple unwritten rule about discretionary purchases around Christmas if you expect any gifts at all. It is: wait until after Christmas. If you don't need it before Christmas and don't get it for Christmas then you can always get it after Christmas if you must. I know this can be a real trial for the "deferred self-gratification" challenged.

Normally my dear wife adheres to the rule, but this year she committed the sin. She wanted an iPod for Christmas. She put it on her list. The 2nd generation ones are pretty amazing. I had my Apple employee connection all set and was figuring out which one to get when my wife told me she saw them on sale and was going to go get one for herself. Hints that she shouldn't be getting things from her Christmas hint list for herself just before Christmas only resulted in her changing her list. Two weeks before Christmas. Grrr. So nix on the iPod and on to plan B ... stick and coal?

Hmmm, maybe I shouldn't wait on that 427 AC Cobra...